Merry Christmas

[julesjones]

A safe and happy Christmas to you all.

I have already had what I expect to be the best present I get this year -- four hand-made peppermint creams, made and posted by a friend who six months ago was not capable of finding her way home from 100 metres down a straight path, let alone the post office. $STUFF is nice, and I am grateful for it, but I am even more grateful for less tangible things. One of those things is the NHS, both as an institution, and as an embodiment of a concept which is known to those of many faiths and no faith, but is summarised in mine as "You shall love your neighbour as yourself."

Comments

[predatrix.livejournal.com]

(hugs) Am glad. I spent much time drawing cards, writing long thoughtful and possibly-amusing letters (and Sherlock ficlets) and making sweets for the first time in my life -- and several people have been much pleased at this.

May have a less-sanguine view of the NHS than you do, but agree that they're competent in their own terms, well-meaning, and had not a clue what to do with me other than explain what I really needed to do was relax, stop thinking (and hide the thoughts I had that were wrong), and do what I was told. At which I go neurotic and twitchy, irritable, and lose the ability to eat, sleep, or find my way out of a wet paper bag.

Have been reading a very helpful book on _Aspies and Mental Illness_. One of the essays had a description of psychotic breakdown that looked very familiar to me. The whole book finally gave me a sense of relief about my self-diagnosis with AS (I'm working on getting a formal diagnosis) and belief that having AS and cerebral palsy are more integral to my nature than the type ii bipolar (although the AS leads to me being so bad at dealing with my bipolar episodes). If I'm *in* an episode the mood disorder is the only thing I and others can see, but every other day of my life I'm affected by being slightly disabled and socially-odd (and having been so bad at jobs I eventually gave up). One of the most distressing aspects of my incarceration was showing a draft of my autobiography to mental health professionals and their failure to see anything except compromised confidentiality. Nobody seemed willing to work with my intelligence and social awkwardness (or deal with me in any other way than telling me I needed to relax and keep taking mood stabilisers), so I was forced to the conclusion that I'd been mistaken because all these highly-qualified professionals didn't want to discuss AS, so all I could focus on was the spiralling tension and distress of the mood disorder.

The book suggests that because AS is a lifelong developmental/brain wiring difference, NHS professionals fully-prepared to handle errant brain chemistry in schizophrenia/mood disorders/etc may well not look out for it, or only be prepared for it in paediatics. This gave me some comfort that I don't have to define my life in a daily losing battle with bipolar disorder (daily writing 'not particularly anything' in a mood diary?) but can get back to the person I recognize as me, finding coping strategies for weak social/physical/organisational skills, and ways of using good verbal skills.

It's not that I'm not bipolar, it's that I'm largely *reactively* bipolar, either reacting to bad things happening or reacting to long periods of aloneness or only speaking to one person.

[julesjones]

The NHS isn't perfect and in some ways has let you down (I'm still angry that you weren't hospitalised at least a week earlier than you were). But it's a system that starts from the concept that access to medical care should not depend on your personal wealth -- and for all its faults, the mental health service in the UK does *not* start from the assumption that the mentally ill suffer from a moral rather than a physical disease.

[predatrix.livejournal.com]

Yes, its heart is in the right place and it must be a massive improvement on the American system or the Victorian British system (which, if memory serves, was particularly keen on dealing with 'moral insanity').

I think it's much better at dealing with more definite things like a single physical injury or one definite mental illness than it is with dealing with murky muddled co-morbid bipolar/AS/slight cerebral palsy presenting with hypochondriac/OCD features.

Sadly, kindness was not the answer, although the unkindness/unwillingness to listen of some of the nurses certainly wasn't either. The answer I'd found last time I was mentally ill was my partner (the person I've talked to most consistently over the past fifteen years or so) and hometown not very far outside the walls of the hospital. These not being available, nothing seemed significant enough

[neyronrose.livejournal.com]

Merry Christmas! Glad you're doing better. I know a fair number of folks who have self-diagnosed with AS and then have had it confirmed. I'll send you some recommendations of books on AS that I found enlightening.

[lexin.livejournal.com]

Having fallen down the stairs at the flat and having spent three hours in the local A&E, I was grateful for the NHS as well. Even if they just told me what I already suspected ("It's a sprain"), I needed to have it checked out.

[julesjones]

Yes, it's remarkably reassuring to be told that you are correct in your self-diagnosis of a sprain, as I found during the Fimbulwinter of two years ago. (Slipped on the very last day of a month of icy pavements, went to the walk-in centre to get them to check that it really was just a sprain and tell me the current preferred treatment.)

[neyronrose.livejournal.com]

Merry Christmas. My parents and I drove from southeastern Pennsylvania to northwest New Jersey (it's about a three hour drive) to have Christmas with my grandmother. She's 91. I'd made her a couple of pairs of earrings, one pair with dark brown wood beads and a pair that were a circle with a flower design on the bottom of the circle. She seemed to like them. She really likes handmade presents.

[jhall1.livejournal.com]

That's good to hear. :)